Day: August 10, 2015

7 Ways to Emancipate Yourself from Mental Slavery.

Here are the 7 tips to break the chains that are holding you captive.

Mental Slavery

1. Believe in yourself.

You have to believe in yourself ultimately. Always Think big and Dream big. Focus on your strengths and work on developing your shortfalls. Don’t compare yourself to others and don’t let circumstances dictate what you are capable of achieving.

2. Work hard.

Do what you can do. Don’t waste time feeling sorry for yourself. Take responsibility for where you are. Stop feeling like you’re owed. If you want something, you owe it to yourself to go out and get it. Nothing worth having comes easy.

3. Turn negatives into positives.

Don’t dwell on others opinions of you or take things personally.  Don’t blame and harbour toxic emotions. It will only hold you back. Let it add fuel to the fire.

4. Never give up.

Ask for what you want. Be confident about it. Remember, there comes a time when you have to fight for your dream. You need to struggle to make it happen. How many times will you try before you decide to give up?  Thomas Edison‘s teachers said he was “too stupid to learn anything.” He was fired from his first two jobs for being “non-productive.” As an inventor, Edison made 1,000 unsuccessful attempts at inventing the light bulb. When a reporter asked, “How did it feel to fail 1,000 times?” Edison replied, I didn’t fail 1,000 times. The light bulb was an invention with 1,000 steps.  Never Quit! This is your dream and you have to protect it. I try every door until I have exhausted all options and yet I don’t give up.

5. Be Patient.

For everything there is a time and season. The waiting period can be the most difficult but it’s important to not let doubt and fear creep in.

6. Build a Strong Support Network.

There are days when it becomes too much for you. You may need a little help to get back up. “Surround yourself with the dreamers and the doers, the believers and thinkers, but most of all, surround yourself with those who see the greatness within you.” ~Edmund Lee

7. Have faith.

You need to believe that things will work out. Some things are out of your control. I trust that God will take me through those difficult moments and that gives me peace even when things don’t go my way.

 

 

How to Bounce Back After a Disappointment.

Failure and disappointment are inevitable parts of life, yet difficult and challenging to deal with. We all face moments when we don’t achieve our goals despite our best efforts. We may not find our dream job or soul mate. It may be too late to have more children, or the house with ocean view may be out of reach. Relationships may end despite our best efforts to save them, friends or lovers may betray us, we may not get the promotion we worked so hard for, or our children may not be as motivated as we want them to be.

Thousand Thoughts

What do you do when life knocks you down and the happiness and success you dream of seems out of reach? Below are 8 practical ways to cope with an experience of failure:

Face the truth.

Denying the reality of a bad situation, or avoiding thinking about it at all, makes it worse—or keeps you stuck when you could be working on solving the problem. Awareness is the first step to change. Be willing to face the problem.

Allow yourself to mourn lost dreams.

The gap between how you wanted things to turn out and how they actually did can lead to sadness and regret. Mourning is a step toward letting go. Take time to connect with your feelings in a compassionate way. Writing down your feelings or talking to a trusted friend can help.

Don’t get stuck feeling like a victim.

Whatever your situation, you always have choices and skills to deal with it. Think about other situations you coped with successfully and how you might apply the same skills to this situation. If you’re being mistreated, speak up or walk away.

Check if your expectations are realistic.

The 21st century presents us with new realities, including less job creation and more competition for entry into the best colleges. There are no guarantees, and you may need to take alternative routes to your goals. It may take months or years to get the job you really want or earn the salary you think you deserve.

Be kind to yourself.

When things don’t work out, it may not be because you did anything wrong. You may be turned down for a job if you’re not the best match for a company’s needs. The person you are drawn to may be love avoidant, already in a relationship, or a narcissist. While it’s important to look at the situation to see what you can learn, adopt a compassionate attitude, rather than judging yourself harshly, so you don’t get stuck in shame.

Change Your Strategy.

f what you are doing isn’t working, you may need to do something different. To succeed as an entrepreneur, you may need to improve your product or service, your marketing strategy, or your interpersonal skills. If there is no market for your services, you may have to reinvent yourself.

 

The Six Attributes of Courage.

Courage is something that everybody wants — an attribute of good character that makes us worthy of respect. From the Bible to fairy tales; ancient myths to Hollywood movies,our culture is rich with exemplary tales of bravery and self-sacrifice for the greater good. From the cowardly lion in The Wizard of Oz who finds the courage to face the witch, to David battling Goliath in the Bible, to Star Wars and Harry Potter, children are raised on a diet of heroic and inspirational tales.

 Courage

Yet courage is not just physical bravery. History books tell colorful tales of social activists, such as Martin Luther King and Nelson Mandela, who chose to speak out against injustice at great personal risk. Entrepreneurs such as Steve Jobs and Walt Disney, who took financial risks to follow their dreams and innovate are like modern-day knights, exemplifying the rewards and public accolades that courage can bring. There are different types of courage, ranging from physical  strength and endurance to mental stamina and innovation. The below quotes demonstrate six different ways in which we define courage.Which are most relevant to you? In the last section, i present an exercise to help you define and harness your own courage.

1. Feeling Fear Yet Choosing to Act

“Bran thought about it. ‘Can a man still be brave if he’s afraid?’ ‘That is the only time a man can be brave,’ his father told him.” ― George R.R. Martin, A Game of Thrones

Fear and courage are brothers. — Proverb

I learned that courage was not the absence of fear, but the triumph over it. The brave man is not he who does not feel afraid, but he who conquers that fear — Nelson Mandela

There is no living thing that is not afraid when it faces danger. The true courage is in facing danger when you are afraid. — L.Frank Baum, The Wonderful Wizard of Oz

Being terrified but going ahead and doing what must be done—that’s courage. The one who feels no fear is a fool, and the one who lets fear rule him is a coward. ― Piers Anthony

Courage is about doing what you’re afraid to do. There can be no courage unless you’re scared. Have the courage to act instead of react.” — Oliver Wendell Holmes

2. Following Your Heart 

“Passion is what drives us crazy, what makes us do extraordinary things, to discover, to challenge ourselves. Passion is and should always be the heart of courage.” ― Midori Komatsu

And most important, have the courage to follow your heart and intuition. They somehow already know what you truly want to become. Everything else is secondary.” — Steve Jobs, Stanford commencement speech, June 2005

To dare is to lose one’s footing momentarily. To not dare is to lose oneself.
 — Soren Kierkegaard

“It takes courage … to endure the sharp pains of self discovery rather than choose to take the dull pain of unconsciousness that would last the rest of our lives.” ― Marianne Williamson, “Return to Love: Reflections on the Principles of ‘A Course in Miracles’

3. Persevering in the Face of Adversity

When we are afraid we ought not to occupy ourselves with endeavoring to prove that there is no danger, but in strengthening ourselves to go on in spite of the danger. — Mark Rutherford
A hero is no braver than an ordinary man, but he is braver five minutes longer. — Ralph Waldo Emerson (1803 – 1882)

Most of our obstacles would melt away if, instead of cowering before them, we should make up our minds to walk boldly through them — Orison Swett Marden (1850-1924)

Courage doesn’t always roar. Sometimes courage is the little voice at the end of the   day that says I’ll try again tomorrow. — Mary Anne Radmacher

“Go back?” he thought. “No good at all! Go sideways? Impossible! Go forward? Only thing to do! On we go!” So up he got, and trotted along with his little sword held in front of him and one hand feeling the wall, and his heart all of a patter and a pitter.” ― J.R.R. Tolkien, The Hobbit

“It’s not the size of the dog in the fight, it’s the size of the fight in the dog.” — Mark Twain

4. Standing Up For What Is Right

Sometimes standing against evil is more important than defeating it. The greatest heroes stand because it is right to do so, not because they believe they will walk away with their lives. Such selfless courage is a victory in itself ― N.D. Wilson, Dandelion Fire

Speak your mind, even if your voice shakes — Maggie Kuhn, Social Activist

From caring comes courage. — Lao Tzu

Anger is the prelude to courage. ― Eric Hoffer

5. Expanding Your Horizons; Letting Go of the Familiar

Man cannot discover new oceans unless he has the courage to lose sight of the shore. — Lord Chesterfield

“This world demands the qualities of youth; not a time of life but a state of mind, a temper of the will, a quality of the imagination, a predominance of courage over timidity, of the appetite for adventure over the life of ease.” ― Robert F. Kennedy

Life shrinks or expands in proportion to one’s courage. — Anais Nin

6. Facing Suffering  With Dignity or Faith.

 “There is no need to be ashamed of tears, for tears bear witness that a man has the greatest of courage, the courage to suffer.” — Frank

The ideal man bears the accidents of life with dignity and grace, making the best of circumstances. — Aristotle

Until the day of his death, no man can be sure of his courage. — Jean Anoulh

A man of courage is also full of faith. — Marcus Tullius Cicero

 

Source: Psychology Today