Year: 2014

Its Your Life and You MUST Take Charge of It !!!

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It’s time to take care of you. Live your dream. Do what you know and not what you feel. Listen to what your heart says,  listen to what you always asked for.  You deserve to live too! You have needs too! 

Give yourself a mental break and take time to get centered, grounded and reconnected with your spirit. Allowing your time to be wasted with people who are not serious is not fruitful and it’s stressful. Be with the ones who Inspires you instead of those who stops you.

Staying in a job where you are not appreciated or valued or validated is draining and toxic. They don’t deserve you. Hanging on to a relationship that has been dead a long time ago takes a toll. Finish it off now, take a stand !!!  Take a deep breath and tap into the courage to make the tough decision.

Things might be difficult for a while, but don’t underestimate yourself.  You are Blessed with huge Potentials. Have Faith in The Almighty and Trust Self. Follow your Intuition, everything is already there for you. All you need do is to trust them have faith in it and open your divine heart to receive it. Intuitions will show you ways to get your desires manifested and believe me these will lead you on the right path if you have faith in your inner self. With this you will experience greatest transformation within yourself.

 

 

Manage all Your Negative Thoughts on Your Own Now, using Swish. Learn How!!!

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The Swish is an NLP technique for dealing with unpleasant feelings.

This is a valuable technique for managing negative thoughts and feelings about:

  • The past: e.g. feelings from embarrassing or irritating memories
  • The present: e.g. feelings provoked by self-undermining thoughts
  • The future: e.g. anxiety-provoking thoughts about forthcoming situations.

Credits for the creation of this NLP pattern belong to Richard Bandler and John Grinder.  This helps to Break an automatic thought or behavior pattern, and replace it with a resourceful one. Use the Swish pattern for problems such as smoking cessation, anger management, public speaking, nervousness, self-confidence, and self-esteem. The Swish is an NLP technique for dealing with unpleasant feelings. With the help of this amazing technique one can get free from any bad habit, he wants to leave. This Transforms your Negativity into Positivity as you will now be able to replace the Negative thoughts into Positive Ones and All your Limiting Beliefs will now be Destroyed with consistent Practice.

Following Steps will help you to Understand the Working of this Powerful Technique.

Step 1. Recognize the automatic reaction

Recognize the automatic reaction , the thoughts, feelings, or images that occur to you when you think of the challenging situation.

Select a replacement image, something inspiring, such as a really good outcome  that helps create a positive state.

Imagine yourself in a dissociated image, the third perceptual position, as if you are watching yourself in a movie.

Enhance the qualities, such as submodalities of the scene until it is as compelling as possible.

*Submodalities refers to the subjective structural subdivisions within a given representational system.

 

Step 2. Determine the trigger of the negative image

Discover what tells your mind to produce the negative image or behavior.This is the very crucial stage of self analysis and you must be Very Honest to yourself.

Ask yourself, “What occurs just before this negative or unwanted state begins?” This time, you want an associated scene (first position, looking through your own eyes) of what is going on immediately before you engage in the unwanted activity.

Remember to think in terms of sub-modalities  to get a detailed sense of the scene. It functions as a trigger for the non-resourceful state.

Step 3. Place the replacement

Put the replacement off in the corner of the negative image. For Example you want to replace the Feeling of Failure with the one of Learning from the event that has happened. Imagine a small, postage-stamp-sized version of your replacement scene in the bottom corner of the negative scene.

Step 4. Swish the two images

You will be making both images change simultaneously and with increasing speed.  The bad feeling getting smaller and smaller with an increase in size of the picture of something positive you want to replace it with. When you Swish, have the negative scene become smaller and shoot off into the distance. At the same time, have the positive replacement image zip in closer and larger, rapidly and completely replacing the negative scene.

Imagine it making a strong sound (a sound that you can easily associate with) as it zips into place.

At first, you’ll probably do this slowly, taking a few seconds to complete the Swish.
As you repeat the process, you will be able to do it faster and faster, until you Swish nearly instantaneously.

Step 5. Repeat

Clear your mind after each Swish. This is very important. Do this by thinking of something else, such as your favorite color or what you need to do later. Remember to breathe easily during the Swish and the breaks. Do the Swish five to seven times, repeating steps three to five each time.
You know you have a good outcome when you have some difficulty maintaining the negative image.

 

Step 6. Test

Now try to use the limiting thought or behavior again. Notice how hard, if not impossible, it is for you to act it out. Notice that you actually have to think about how to do it first; it is not as automatic as it used to be. If you feel that you could relapse, use the Swish again in a day or two, and again after a week.

 

You Need To Practice on a Regular Basis So that you can have a Grip over It.

Find It Useful? Share with your Social Networks.  

Boost You Memory – Correct Your Sleeping Habits.

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There is nothing as refreshing as a good night’s sleep. You wake up feeling revitalized and ready to face the

day’s challenges. This is because during sleep, growth hormones are released to heal damaged tissue,

including brain tissue. Sleep also oils the cogs of the cognitive system by “reviewing and recalling” the day’s

experiences, which helps transfer information into your long-term memory. Sleep regulates your body clock,

known as the “circadian rhythm,” which is naturally attuned with the daily cycle of light and darkness, and is

detected by your eyes. It is the reason why people suffer from jet lag after a long-haul flight, and it takes awhile for the body clock to readjust.

 

How much sleep?

 

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The amount of sleep required varies from person to person. Some people can get by with as little as five hours a night,

while others need nine. It is important to be aware of what your own “magic number” is and try to stick to that figure.

Otherwise you risk inhibiting your productivity as well as your ability to remember and process information. A lack of sleep

puts an enormous strain on the brain. Studies have shown that asleep-deprived brain loses efficiency.

An area usually active during a specific task needs to be propped up by other parts of the brain. It is like driving a vehicle

with a flat tire—your performance is severely reduced. Sleep deprivation also increases stress hormone levels, which

reduces nerve cell production (neurogenesis) in the adult brain. Sleep can be divided into four separate brain

stages. There’s the theta wave when we sometimes rouse with a sudden jerk. Then there’s the delta wave activity,

during which if awaken you’d be totally disorientated. While asleep you go back and forth through these two brainwave

patterns in 90-minute cycles. It is then that you also enter REM sleep, where your eyelids show movement of a seemingly alert mind.

And then, of course, there’s the dream state which, according to Freud, acts as a safety valve for the overburdened brain.

 

Nap for a mini brain boost

 

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If you feel drowsy in the early afternoon, perhaps after lunch, take a 20-minute nap. It might be impractical in many circumstances

but it will do your brain more good than reaching for a cup of coffee. Daytime napping is healthy for the brain.

You need it to refresh your brain cells and allow the different areas to recover. If your brain’s tired, your performance will slow down

. A nap is also a good de-stresser. Some researchers have even suggested that a six-minute nap can improve performances in

memory and problem-solving tests.

 

Top tips for good sleep

 

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Things You Never Thought Of , Can End Your Relationship !!!

Relationship Myths.

 

Music, movies, friends and fairy tales teach us how to love but they don’t teach us what not to do and where it can go wrong.  Will you accept any suggestion without asking a single question about it? Don’t you argue to a statement said by a friend or a teacher or anyone who you think is trying to advice you?

Then how can you accept such lessons without questioning , this can be dangerous to the health of your relationships.  Here are five myths that can kill any love relationship.

You’ll be wise to avoid them.

 

  1. Love is enough.
  2. There is nothing to learn.
  3. If you love me, you’ll _______.
  4. My mate will change.
  5. I’ll do my half.

 

 

  1. Love is enough.

This is a lie. Love alone is not enough to hold you together. There must be communication, a sense of togetherness and understanding each other is an important part of any relationship. Life brings with it challenges. There comes a point when you now have to find out how to share the same house, the same room, the same bed, and the same money you have.

This will be no longer a dating scene as it used to be, you now have new friends, relatives, and strangers to deal with. Those charming things you like about each other are now with you all the time. Closeness brings intimacy but it also brings a need to change and adapt. Change is difficult. You can tolerate so much of change that won’t affect you.

In fact, studies show that living together before marriage is an indicator for a higher chance of divorce. Even though you can’t avoid problems, you can prevent their damage. What you can do is to create a safe environment at home where you can talk with each other, get some time to communicate with each other.  When you can talk without fear of criticism, anger, or any other lack of support, you can talk about anything. Problems can only be solved when you can talk as true partners, without any fear of one denying other.

                                   

  1. There is nothing to learn

Since love is not enough and you were probably not taught neither you were keen to learn how to communicate and solve problems, it’s time to learn. Even couples who have come from the best of homes probably never saw their parents solve problems. What they often get to see is a conflict in place every third day and then none of them talking to one another till the weekend. Parents rarely are able to teach their children the skills for handling difficult times and the skills for keeping love alive.

As your relation celebrates more days adding into it making it closer to one more anniversary, romance takes a backseat. Romance often get reduced gradually with the time, there can be many reasons for the same. As you grow through life, you will change. Your partner will change. Your relationship will change. If you stay open to accepting change, you can grow from it rather than resisting it.

Learning who you are and who your partner is can be a wonderful experience. Just remember that it doesn’t stop when you think you have learned everything from the past. You have the present and the future to look forward to.

 

  1. If you love me, you’ll _______.

Fill in the blank with what comes to mind.

Some popular ones are: …you’ll change, know what I need, do what I want, give in, and just trust me. This statement makes love conditional upon the other person doing what you ask as a proof of their love. Such expectation of conditional love is dangerous. There is a dark translation to this type of expectation. What you are saying, in effect is, “I don’t trust your love so you better prove it to me now.”, or “I don’t care enough about you to consider your feelings, wants, and needs. What I want is more important.”

This type of statement can be a warning sign. Demand and conditional love usually say more about the person making the statement than about the recipient. It speaks to an unreasonable expectation that may be motivated by a lack of care about the partner or by a personal lack of self-esteem.  Expectations of “knowing what I need” demand that your partner have the ability to mind read. I noticed it many times that your girl will not ask for what she need, thinking as if you know her demands. You are in a relationship doesn’t mean that you know everything about your partner. You are not a mind reader I believe!!! They must tell what they need and what they don’t.

The only way your partner can know what you need, want, feel, or think is your telling them. Good communication is a powerful tool for understanding. On the other hand, it is not unreasonable to have expectations of your partner in the relationship. How you voice them is important.

 

  1. My mate will change.

Yes, they will and you have no control. The people who expect there mate to change in the way they want are the ones who gets disappointed. The only person you can ever change is yourself.  This can be a relationship killing expectation, as no one changes for anybody and no one actually should change for any person except himself/herself.  In many cases, they expect there partner to change for example If he is a foodie and you cannot expect him to be on diet as soon as he marries you !!!

Such demands are unreasonable, unwelcome, and unlikely to succeed.

People change because they want to not because you want them to. And all people change and grow as they age. But people rarely change for the better when they are under pressure from someone else…even a loved one.

The strongest relationships are founded on the commitment of two strong individuals who bring themselves to the relationship. It means compromise, growth and change but it does not mean giving in to the unreasonable demands of another. The article, Change and Grow has some further insights on this subject.

 

  1. I’ll do my half.

 It’s about compromising several times; you compromise because you love your partner. There is no such thing as a truly successful long term marriage where each partner gives only their half (50%). The only truth is that our expectations for a fairy tale marriage lead us down the road to disappointment, disillusionment, and divorce.

“I’ve had it. You’re selfish. If you really loved me, you’d understand what I need. I’ve been giving and giving and I get nothing in return. You don’t give me what I want anymore. Maybe we should get divorced.”  This conversation or others like it is held are more common in relationships these days. Being in a relationship is not that easy and magical as they show us on television or movies. It takes lot of efforts; it’s about keeping aside your ego. Sometimes you have to fight with your own-self. Relationships can provide you immense pleasure and strength but when it comes to hardships this can let you experience the worst.

The truth will help you create your role in a positive lifetime marriage. The Truth: Men and women are not equal. Thank God. We are different as individuals and, in that difference, lies part of the answer to a happy marriage. What we choose to do with those differences determines, perhaps more than love, what our relationship will look like. And it’s not a fifty-fifty deal. A truly happy and lifetime marriage relationship is a seventy five: seventy five proposition (75:75) and all marriages will have problems at some time. It’s inevitable. Differences and intimacy are a recipe for conflict.

By giving more than half, with the faith that you are both committed to the same marriage team and by communicating for understanding, with the goal of a winning marriage, you can overcome the inevitable problems of creating a happy married life. You can prosper and be happy when you each give seventy five percent to your marriage.

When you know that your partner is contributing more than their fair share, it’s easier for you to do the same. Even though the fairy tales aren’t always right, there can be a happy ending; a happy  married life for those of you who commit to giving more to your marriage. When you communicate for understanding, and make your relationship a priority, you do have a chance of succeeding where so many other millions have failed. Yes, it takes work.

 

Screwed up in Financial aspect Of Your Life? Here’s what Tony Suggests…

There’s nothing worse than a rich person who’s chronically angry or unhappy. There’s really no excuse for it, yet I see this phenomenon every day. It results from an extremely unbalanced life, one with too much expectation and not enough appreciation for what’s there.

Without gratitude and appreciation for what you already have, you’ll never know true fulfillment. But how do you cultivate balance in life? What’s the point of achievement if your life has no balance?

For nearly four decades, I’ve had the privilege of coaching people from every walk of life, including some of the most powerful men and women on the planet. I’ve worked with presidents of the United States as well as owners of small businesses.

Across the board, I’ve found that virtually every moment people make three key decisions that dictate the quality of their lives.

If you make these decisions unconsciously, you’ll end up like majority of people who tend to be out of shape physically, exhausted emotionally and often financially stressed. But if you make these decisions consciously, you can literally change the course of your life today.

Decision 1: Carefully choose what to focus on.

At every moment, millions of things compete for your attention. You can focus on things that are happening right here and now or on what you want to create in the future. Or you can focus on the past.

Where focus goes, energy flows. What you focus on and your pattern for doing so shapes your entire life.

Which area do you tend to focus on more: what you have or what’s missing from your life?

I’m sure you think about both sides of this coin. But if you examine your habitual thoughts, what do you tend to spend most of your time dwelling on?

Rather than focusing on what you don’t have and begrudging those who are better off than you financially, perhaps you should acknowledge that you have much to be grateful for and some of it has nothing to do with money. You can be grateful for your health, family, friends, opportunities and mind.

Developing a habit of appreciating what you have can create a new level of emotional well-being and wealth. But the real question is, do you take time to deeply feel grateful with your mind, body, heart and soul? That’s where the joy, happiness and fulfillment can be found.

Consider a second pattern of focus that affects the quality of your life: Do you tend to focus more on what you can control or what you can’t?

If you focus on what you can’t control, you’ll have more stress in life. You can influence many aspects of your life but you usually can’t control them.

When you adopt this pattern of focus, your brain has to make another decision.

Decision 2: Figure out, What does this all mean?

Ultimately, how you feel about your life has nothing to do with the events in it or with your financial condition or what has (or hasn’t) happened to you. The quality of your life is controlled by the meaning you give these things.

Most of the time you may be unaware of the effect of your unconscious mind in assigning meaning to life’s events.

When something happens that disrupts your life (a car accident, a health issue, a job loss), do you tend to think that this is the end or the beginning?

If someone confronts you, is that person insulting you, coaching you or truly caring for you?

Does a devastating problem mean that God is punishing you or challenging you? Or is it possible that this problem is a gift from God?

Your life takes on whatever meaning you give it. With each meaning comes a unique feeling or emotion and the quality of your life involves where you live emotionally.

I always ask during my seminars, “How many of you know someone who is on antidepressants and still depressed?” Typically 85 percent to 90 percent of those assembled raise their hands.

How is this possible? The drugs should make people feel better. It’s true that antidepressants do come with labels warning that suicidal thoughts are a possible side effect.

But no matter how much a person drugs himself, if he constantly focuses on what he can’t control in life and what’s missing, he won’t find it hard to despair. If he adds to that a meaning like “life is not worth living,” that’s an emotional cocktail that no antidepressant can consistently overcome.

Yet if that same person can arrive at a new meaning, a reason to live or a belief that all this was meant to be, then he will be stronger than anything that ever happened to him.

When people shift their habitual focus and meanings, there’s no limit on what life can become. A change of focus and a shift in meaning can literally alter someone’s biochemistry in minutes.

So take control and always remember: Meaning equals emotion and emotion equals lifeChoose consciously and wisely. Find an empowering meaning in any event, and wealth in its deepest sense will be yours today.

Once you create a meaning in your mind, it creates an emotion, and that emotion leads to a state for making your third decision:

Decision 3: What will you do?  

The actions you take are powerfully shaped by the emotional state you’re in. If you’re angry, you’re going to behave quite differently than if you’re feeling playful or outrageous.

If you want to shape your actions, the fastest way is to change what you focus on and shift the meaning to be something more empowering.

Two people who are angry will behave differently. Some pull back. Others push through.

Some individuals express anger quietly. Others do so loudly or violently. Yet others suppress it only to look for a passive-aggressive opportunity to regain the upper hand or even exact revenge.

Where do these patterns come from? People tend to model their behavior on those they respect, enjoy and love.

The people who frustrated or angered you? You often reject their approaches.

Yet far too often you may find yourself falling back into patterns you witnessed over and over again in your youth and were displeased by.

It’s very useful for you to become aware of your patterns when you are frustrated, angry or sad or feel lonely. You can’t change your patterns if you’re not aware of them.

Now that you’re aware of the power of these three decisions, start looking for role models who are experiencing what you want out of life. I promise you that those who have passionate relationships have a totally different focus and arrive at totally different meanings for the challenges in relationships than people who are constantly bickering or fighting.

It’s not rocket science. If you become aware of the differences in how people approach these three decisions, you’ll have a pathway to help you create a permanent positive change in any area of life.

This piece was adapted from Tony Robbins’ new book, Money Master the Game: 7 Simple Steps to Financial Freedom.  

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Know Yourself Through Introspection.

Intro

 

It is through meditation the integration of the personality – the blending of the physical, the mental, the intellectual and the spiritual are made into one harmonious whole.
Meditation is the highest spiritual discipline.
Through meditation one comes to experience peace within and without and the mind grows up to view life as a whole.

It starts with the practice of detaching ourselves from our body, mind, and intellect, and impartially estimating the motives, intentions and purposes that lie behind our thoughts, words and deeds.

This Process of analyzing and evaluating ourselves is called Introspection.
The process is simple and understandable yet it is no easy feat to accomplish.

Self – analysis and self-criticism are hard and relentless tasks. Humans can commit a mistake but will never accept it; a few might accept what they did wrong. It takes Lot of Courage to blame self.At every stage, our self-conceit and egoistic self-congratulations would cover our faults and shortcomings, and invest them with a false charm. No one can easily understand himself as he is; he may be a very intelligent and acute critic of men and their actions. Even to the best of us, it is a trial and a severe challenge to be asked to observe ourselves.

The contrast between ‘what we actually are’ and ‘what we believe ourselves to be’ is the first great hurdle to be jumped over by every spiritual aspirant.

Introspection or self-analysis is the only means to relieve this initial blockade.

Invariably, self-examination reveals the personality under report to be a WRETCH, a bundle of negative values, false hopes, self-polluting thoughts, low passions, animal urges, and impossible dreams -, in short, there is in our inner life a good deal of Mr. Hyde ; conceited, deluded, steeped in endless arrogance, laughable stupidities , and reprehensible brutalities !! To apprehend this champion within us , engaged in endless fights, is to discover in us an ugly , pathetic, creature who fights and looks, kills and cooks, earns and hoards, acquires and multiplies — all only to delude himself with some impermanent and incomplete satisfaction.

Once one has thus discovered oneself through correct self-analysis, the battle is already won. It is a ticklish task to apprehend the devils lurking within; but, once detected in their dark corners, many of them would take to their heels without even as much as a show of fight! Only a few — an insignificant few indeed– may probably remain to grin and cut a grotesque caper! But, if the aspirant has the required will and courage to have confidence in his own strength, it will not be long before he crosses the moat and captures the castle of divine Life.

Introspection reveals many a sad weaknesses in every one of us. He alone, who has the honesty of purpose and the heroism to cleanse his minds of all its animalism by placing those negative worldly tendencies of living with the positive divine principles of existence, is the true inheritor of the Life Divine.

More will be out soon on Introspection.

Practice it to feel the Transformation.

Its Equally Difficult to be a Man In India !!!

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I have been meaning to shout this out loud for too long. I finally get to pen it down. We all know it’s difficult to be a woman in India, it’s stressful and it’s scary. But have you ever thought about how it is to be a man in this country? Let me tell you, it’s horrible.1. I am a victim of generalization
No matter who does what, I’m called a rapist or a guy who doesn’t respect women.2. I am forced to consume feminist content each day stereotyping Indian men
Male-dominant society, dowry, rape, gender inequality etc etc. I feel miserable when I come across such news every day but I have no choice because I am the target. It doesn’t matter if I have respected every woman in my life with all my heart each day of my life.

3. I am always the criminal around a female
It may be the case that a girl just slapped me and I am just arguing but you’ll soon see a crowd gathering around me to beat me up most probably. I’m basically always a “dick” with a dick.

4. If I ever get raped (which is possible), there’s no law and order to fight for me
According to Indian law, the definition of rape starts with, “Any man subjecting a woman to sexual…” So I can’t go to court if ever I go through something horrific like this in my life.

5. I’m a gifted human being who faces no issues in life, at least according to the media
I may get sexually abused, beaten up by my wife or raped by a woman or men, this will never get reported because of course, I will be at fault somewhere there. And no, nobody would go on a candle light vigil for me.

6. I am judged no matter what I do
If I am really sweet and caring, I am gay. If I am a little shy around females, I’m a sissy. If I let my girlfriend be and I’m not romantic, I’m a typical “boy” and if I have a temper issue, I’m a guy with the biggest male ego on the planet.

7. There’s great possibility of me going behind bars at least once in my lifetime
There are so many laws protecting women against men and these have been misused as well but there are none to protect me in case my girlfriend misuses her right and takes advantage of the fact that there are no laws to protect me. I understand the intensity of the situation in our country but in this country itself, there are more boys who are sexually molested when they are young. What about that?

8. To get married, I need to go through an exam no matter how insulted I feel
I am grilled about my income by every girl’s father in an arranged marriage setting. I am forced to take dowry even if I say No. If I accept it without hesitating, I am a greedy pig. If I say No, I am “Proud”. I am asked all sorts of embarrassing questions about my job, my assets (no pun intended), my past, my present, my future and if there’s still time left, I’m asked if I want to get married. If I say No, there’s a whole new story to that.

9. I’m called orthodox if I try and protect the girls around me
I have no issues with girls wearing short clothes but knowing the society, if I request my girlfriend or sister to restrain from wearing revealing clothes on the streets, I’m judged. The “caring” part goes down the drain.

10. I’m constantly reminded that I’m a Man and sometimes, taught too
I am sick and tired of being taught to be what I’ve been for so many years. I’m a man and I know it but I don’t want to be bullied for that. “Be the man” is what everyone says easily but when it comes to feminism, man is equal to woman. First you confuse me by saying we need gender equality and the next minute you tell me to be the man and not cry. What should I do?In the whole process of protecting women and listening to news, you have forgotten that I’m a human being too. Why am I being punished for the crime I never even think of committing? I’m a man but I’m not a rapist or a sadist or a “typical Indian man” but there are some days, I’m forced to believe so.

Transform Your Life, Here’s How.

The Dickens process
The Process is based on Charles Dickens’ character “The Scrooge”, where he meets the ghost on Christmas morning and is shown the future of what his life will be like if he keeps up his current behaviour. This causes so much pain for Scrooge that it changes his life forever, affecting everyone around him.
The Dickens Process uses some simple yet amazing technology from NLP and other sciences. It’s not designed just to consciously think your way into changing because this never works. This process operates on a subconscious and emotional level , in this process people are made to look beyond , they are made to see the future they will be going to have if they carries the same habits weather good or bad. This pattern focuses on taking the human mind ahead with all the present habits and situations making them to see what kind of the future they will have if they follows the same life style.
We all know what we should be doing in life and what needs to change in order to have the life we want but rarely do we ever do it. The simple reason for this is that there is little to no emotional association to what will happen if we continue a negative belief, thought or behaviour.
If you can fully associate to the massive pain of a limiting pattern, this will give you sufficient leverage to change it, the rest is up to you to replace the broken pattern with an empowering alternative and condition it.this makes you associate the pain that you going to face in the coming future coz of the limitations and your own negative beliefs so that you can easily leave all such habits that are causing pain and trouble in your present as well as future.
The good news is that it becomes almost easy to replace a limiting pattern once you get enough leverage.
I will provide an explanation and some instructions for using the Dickens Process. Keep in mind that this is on the printed page and may not provide you with sufficient emotional association for change but it is aimed at introducing you to this amazing transformational technique.
Get yourself into a position that you feel is easiest to visualise and emotionally associate to memories both real and constructed/projected anything that you can easily think of  or any habit that you want to leave but you are still carrying the same .This process is about associating massive pain to your limiting patterns so it is best done in a position you don’t find too comfortable such as standing.So be comfortable and feel relaxed before you proceed .
Another reason for standing is that you have much more access to all the movements of your physiology, which, as I have mentioned before, is one of the key ingredients to emotional states. Your body tells you how to feel.
Now, visualise your life right now. What do you have in your life?what you achieved ?? What are you missing out on in your life? What limiting patterns do you indulge in? what is there that stops you to move ahead?? Are they emotions? Are they behaviours? Are they limiting beliefs or decisions?
Once you are emotionally associated to the pain of what you are missing out on in the present moment, rise up above your life and see it from above the stream of time, see yourself in the picture while dissociated.
Still above the stream of time, travel back in time and drop in on some of your most painful moments. How have your limiting patterns affected you up until now? With the benefit of hindsight, what do you regret? What would you never do if you had your time over?
Feel the feelings, see this sights, hear the sounds of each moment as if you were reliving it right now. Keep traveling back through your stream of time dropping in on your most regrettable and painful moments that you would love to change. Emotionally associate to each as if it were happening all over again.
Now, rise up again above the stream of time and travel back to the present moment. What have your limiting beliefs and patterns cost you? Travel out into your future above the stream of time. Drop in to your life three months into the future.
What have your limiting patterns cost you having not changed them? What is your life like in three months having held onto these limiting patterns? Associate to the massive pain you will feel as if it is happening now. Do the same for 6 months, one year, 5 years and 10 years.
Travel back to your present moment with the benefit of foresight now that you truly know what the cost of these limiting patterns are. What are your new empowering patterns and beliefs?? How will you replace the limiting ones?your strengths ??
Project back into the future now that you have changed your limiting patterns, beliefs and behaviours. Associate to the massive pleasure you now have after changing these patterns once and for all.
Now celebrate your new compelling future!!!
END PROCESS.
 Have you ever thought that if you could go back to a certain time in your life when “it all went wrong” then you could use your new wisdom and hindsight to change the rest of your life?
The problem is that we can never have the past back but you can prevent the same problems from ever happening in the future. Look at it this way, every problem we ever have is usually imagined because what we generally fear hasn’t happened yet, it’s what we fear might result out of a given situation.
The power of the Dickens Process is that you are given advanced warning to change what will certainly cause you tremendous pain in the future.
I hope you gained something from this issue.

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The Inner-Self Of Shiva !!!

Shiva is auspiciousness. Shiva is bliss. Shiva is the consciousness. More importantly, Shiva is the Self of one and all.
It is said that God sleeps in rocks, dreams in plants, wakes up in animals and becomes aware of Himself in human beings. Human being is the vehicle for Universal consciousness to the Glory of the Self as the creation.
Lord Shiva is giving a call for all of us to wake up from the dream of limited concept of self, based on body-mind-intellect complex to experience nature of Him in the core of our being. To experience Lord Shiva as our inner Self and as the Self of the whole creation is to the find deeper meaning in life which frees us from the conflicts imposed by the perceived qualities of creation.

 

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Pure awareness is one‟s Self.
Pure awareness is the Self of one and all. Pure awareness is Lord Shiva whose nature is existence, consciousness and bliss. Everything and everyone is Lord Shiva. There is nothing other than Lord Shiva. Lord Shiva is the inner reality of mind and body and outer reality of cosmos. Blissful nature of Lord Shiva is the sum and substance of the Universe.

Shiva and Shakti
Shakti is the energy of Lord Shiva. Lord Shiva and Shakti are one. Shiva is Shakti and Shakti is Shiva. They are inseparable like heat in fire or fragrance of flower. She is the Self-awareness of Shiva and also the power of consciousness by which everything else is revealed. She expresses in the form of infinite Will, Wisdom and Action of Lord Shiva. As Universal Mother, she creates, sustains and destroys the whole Universe.

Shiva and Jiva
Jiva is the atomic soul manifested from Lord Shiva. Shiva is jiva and jiva is Shiva. By His own power of Will, Lord Shiva takes the form of infinite number of atomic souls or javas by restricting His
power of Will, Wisdom and Action. The essential nature of Lord Shiva existence, consciousness and bliss does not get affected in spite of His expansion as creation.

Parama Shiva and Spanda Shakti
Parama Shiva is the transcendent form of Shiva unaffected by taking the limited form of jiva. In His transcend form, He is pure awareness. Shakti – the energy, in the form of subtlest vibration is the heartbeat of Parama Shiva. Because of pulsation of Spanda Shakti, whole of the Universe is created sustained and dissolved. She is also called Para Shakti in this form.

Shiva and Universe
The creation is nothing but Lord Shiva. Universe consisting of five elements space, air, fire, and water and earth element are nothing but forms of energy. Energy is of the form Shakti – the expression of Lord Shiva. In other words, the creation is the creator.

 

Men Abuse- Myths and Fact !!!

The history of the abuse of women is well documented and incontrovertible. Women have gained a respectable status in society over a period of time, people talk about equality for all, and they say men and women should be treated equally but, are they actually treated equally?? Women these days are more superior in fact they are made superior and somehow this has raised the issue of men security. What is more hidden and wrapped in myth is the fact of the abuse of men.

It is probably counter intuitive to think of men as subjected to emotional and physical abuse as the hands of women but it does happen. A study conducted by Dr. Robert J.Reid clearly points out the bitter truth that abused men are understudied and hidden.

There are also a number of myths surrounding the issue of abused men.

 

Myth 1: Men are not physically abused by women.

Fact: There is a 40% rate of domestic violence cases involving men being abused by women. Also, physical abuse of men includes being kicked, hit and forced to have sexual relations against their will, yes at times men are forced to have sex even if they don’t feel like having it. The non-physical abuse includes being the target of threats and the recipient of disparaging remarks and curses.

 

Myth 2: Men are not affected when women are abusive.

 Fact: Men suffer from depression as a result of being abused; in some cases this leads to complete mental disorders if not treated well in time. Men suffer in silence for a number of reasons, making them less likely to report the abuse. Men may be Embarrassed or think they can handle the abuse.

 

Myth 3: Men are free to leave abusive relationships as compared to women who often have children or money to worry about.

 Fact: In actuality, men have as much difficulty leaving abusive relationships as do women. As a result, they remain despite ongoing abuse. Some male victims also fear they may be ridiculed for admitting their female partner has abused them. A man who calls the police to report domestic violence is three times more likely to be arrested than the woman. Most victims actually minimize the violence that happens to them because of the guilt, shame, and self-blame attached to victimization, and because others do not believe them or refuse to listen. Leaving is often the hardest thing for a victim to accomplish, and is commonly harder than staying.

 

Myth 4: Domestic abuse affects only people from poor families or from minority groups.

 Fact: Domestic violence of all types does not discriminate. Families from all ethnic, racial and socio-economic groups are affected by domestic violence. It doesn’t categorize based on the earning per capita or the lifestyle one has neither on the basis of religion nor society they are living in. You can notice anyone suffering from Men abuse irrespective of his family or economic background, most common example is men being abused by their superior lady official in an office.

 

Myth 5: If domestic violence and abuse is ignored it will eventually end.

Fact: No problem can ever be solved if ignored again and again, the only way out is to face it, and put enough efforts to fight with the problem. The same is the case with men abuse, the history of domestic violence and abuse of all kinds clearly shows that, if ignored, it will become more violent and in some cases, ending in death. Therefore there is a need of awareness among people on how to deal with this, instead of ignoring they must help someone suffering from such violence.

 

I request the readers to share this and help in awareness.

 

Thanks Readers.

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